14 October 2006

Symphonies In Starlight

I have decided to comment on my attempt at understanding the universe at large. We all have ways of understanding and explaining our connection to the universe at large. Mine is through writing and oft times through poetic expression. Someone else's explanation may be in an artistic fashion, another through music, others through spirituality. Now, many do have trouble with this connection as a whole and live their whole lives without seeing it, much less understanding it. And once one understands, you can see it in others, or the lack thereof.

Of course, I am not out to make others understand, only report on a change of self so profound that in earlier days (maybe in my own earlier days as well), it would have been a religious transformation. Not being religious anymore, I found this understanding to be more of a philosophical change, an intellectual enlightenment that preceded a spiritual one. By a spiritual enlightenment, I do not mean it in the traditional sense, but more of an opening of my spirit that linked itself to my mind and body, creating a deeper understanding of where I have been, what I am, and where I am going. Before, I could not answer questions of myself essential for this understanding. Now I can. And the thing is, understanding the universe as a whole does begin with asking questions of self, what the self is doing, what the self sees around it, and ultimately, self-awareness. Where did I come from? Who am I? Where am I going? Why am I here? The answers are as unique as every atom in the universe and the heart of matter itself. We are unique as each atom in the universe, and when we are gone, we will never again see our like; however, the universe remembers our passing, mourns us, and welcomes us back into the cradle of starlight that made us.

Perhaps I make no sense (sometimes I do not), and maybe some of what I say is ultimately true, but I am comforted to know that I am a part of more than as Sagan put it, 'this pale blue dot'. Our lives have meaning... to more than you know.The following poem was my first attempt at explaining this understanding, and I do not know if I am much better at explaining it. But here it is nonetheless:

'The Edge of Memory'

Time lingers, memory fades...
Yearning for the return to starlight.

Dreams of forms and hopes of souls
Collide in the stillness of time
Wanting to explain
Reaching for an answer
Instead obscured in the shadows of life.

Atoms spin... realities divide
While a universe lives and dies
Forms of souls dream and hope
Longing to be revealed
Seeking rebirth within the cradle of time.

Hearts of stars ebb and flow
Eons pass as they have done
Without explaining
Not caring for answers
Yet nurturing the spark of life.

Thoughts of love's whispers and sighs
Emerge from the glow of starlight
Fearing the moments
Wondering what to do
If they discovered the mystery of time.

But hopes and dreams that form the soul
Vanish beyond the void of night
Believing in what will not come
Reaching for what must not be
Knowing finally the tragedy of life.

All that I am...
Waits at the edge of memory.

C.

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